Pie Five at 11:45

4 months ago same place, same time......same table.


The butt cheeks clenched as tight as can be.


He was there, and so was I. Chalk full of anticipation that I was getting the final chop.


The finality to the wait. The finality to the broken heart. The finality was going to happen, yet I agree to meet anyway.


A quick inbox message....a little late he will be.


I show up as he drives in. I walk up he glances at me.


I wait inside and open the door for him.


He follows - something is different about his approach. Something is different in his step. Something isn't what it was just yesterday when I was finding solid ground on the fact he had no more fucks to give and I must reel in my feelings and get over the zero fucks hill.


He says he'll eat whatever I order him. So I order an all meat pizza with red sauce and he says if I get it right, he'll ask me to marry him. Short of the red sauce that should have been white sauce, I was spot on. Then he added ninety-ten things as toppers.


So we gather our food, drinks, napkins, and sit at the same table 4 months ago that ended in tears and an overwhelming sense of heart break and just feeling absolutely terrible.


Conversation is to be had. I'm so nervous I can hardly eat.


He's wearing that purple under armour shirt.


That I picked out in Los Angeles. Along with the man bag he picked out in Los Angeles. He says he gets more compliments on each than any other piece of clothing he owns.


He says he had to talk to brother Michael Poe, son Michael, son Micah, son Stone, bestie Jeremy Stone, and Cory Walker (pastor of our home church) before he could meet with me.


Oh brother, what is to come?


Turns out he has reconsidered his future. It includes Genevieve and myself. It includes working towards a marriage with me. In Vegas. March 26th. With 4 of our 6 kids.


And he has to talk to my mom......to ask for my hand in marriage.


I can't get uncold, unhurt, unworried.....I don't love him the way I loved him even 1 month ago. I love him, there is no doubt. I love what he does to my heart and soul.


Our boys are excited for us. Our families have yet to discover.


Our friends following suit....no one really knows.


And this, is okay with me. No reason to announce our future to those who aren't in it on a consistent basis.


If Pie Five at 11:45a comes again, the butt cheeks may need medical intervention to be separated.